Jen's Journal

Dear the first,

I remember the first time I saw you.

We were in class, had to say something 

Interesting about ourselves.

You said you were the least interesting person ever,

Called yourself boring.

You were afraid of spiders with their 

Exoskeleton external covering, though 

You were just as rigid as their bodies were.

I never dated in high school, never got to experience

Dating the “bad boy” people warn you about. 

This must be what drew me to you, your brooding 

Nature and nuclear distance. Every time I reached out, 

You waved me aside. Every time I tried to speak,

You shut me down.

You ended things in a letter all

Those years ago, thought you were a depressed poet 

With your melancholy words. But all you are is a 

Stubborn kid who gets upset when you don’t get your way.

I’m glad you were my first

Because I learned it wasn’t worth it

To try to save people who don’t want to be saved. 

Thank you for teaching me what not to look for

In a relationship.