Jen's Journal

“loneliness is a sign you are in desperate need of yourself” -Rupi Kaur

Read this line a few times over. Let your eyes familiarize themselves with the sentence. If this doesn’t resonate with you, I’m happy for you.

If it does, keep reading, I hope you find comfort and company in my words.

Take a moment to find a quiet place to read this. A bedroom maybe, or a bathroom, or a car in the passenger’s seat if that’s where you find yourself.

The loneliest semester of my life was right after my first breakup.

I was in college away from my family. I had no close friends, no one to talk to outside the classroom.

I got into stuffed animals to have something to hold at night. I spent my days in the library, finding comfort in the quiet of an old building.

Students sprawled out with headphones on and a barely away glance at their screen as they typed away.

It was a rough semester in which I considered switching schools.

I came across this quote one day, and it hit me.

I didn’t feel alone because I was alone; I felt alone because I was in desperate need of myself.

What this means is self-reflection, which can be difficult sometimes even scary.

So I started journaling again (I’ve had an on and off relationship with journaling for the last ten years).

In all that time I spent with myself, I fell in love with the idea of being completely alone.

It was weird at first, not having plans and filling my free time with things I wanted to do.

But the more I spent on my own, the more I got to know myself.

I read books that no one assigned, listen to music I can sing along to, and watch sit-coms I’ve watched hundreds of times. I like taking care of plants, people, animals. I enjoy hiking and swimming in the summer and taking hot baths in the winter.

Getting to know yourself is the best way to avoid loneliness.

Can you spend time with yourself? More importantly, do you enjoy alone time?