Jen's Journal

“Everything ends, and that’s always sad. But everything begins too, and that’s always happy.”

My grandmother died on October 3rd. I met her twice in my life, yet I still felt a pang in my chest when I read the words, “your grandmother died last night.” It was the first message I read when I landed in Denver and turned my phone off airplane mode.

My first thought was that it was my grandmother on my mother’s side. I nearly had a panic attack thinking that the woman who raised me most of my life was gone. I called her as soon as I heard the news. She answered on the second call, and I let out a cry of relief. I told her about my grandmother’s death. She told me that it’s a part of life, that everyone’s time eventually comes, and that I should drink a cold beer to lower my blood pressure.

Everything does end, and it’s always sad. I hardly knew my dad’s mom, yet I still shed tears because I remembered how much that woman meant to my father. It felt like losing another piece of him.

I called my mother and she told me stories of how close my father and grandmother were. Even when he was here, he would never stop worrying for her. He would send her all the money he could. He would call her every free chance he got. One time he cried because he heard she was sick. Little did he know, she would outlive him.

But then everything begins again, and that’s always happy. I changed my name recently but kept my fathers name to one day pass it on to my children.